Zal Kopp

Ongoing travel through the memory

I found a way how to satisfy need for a travel. I have memories in me. All my hugs, talks and looks are written in these memories. There are people that I met long time ago, and there are people that I would like to meet. Memories in me move my steps because there are so many places which I did not visit and so many people that I have not met, and because of that I have no peace. It brings me back to the time where all that was developing and starting.  Brings out that my long time ago dreams are not forgotten and reminds me that my dreams are not fake.

Sometimes I loose control of memories and they slide and take me to the places which I always wanted to forget, and to the people which I erased long time ago, but that way I get to know my heart. I learn to feel better. Awake and surrounded with my dreams, I recognize my root from which I grew up. I remember how truly I enjoyed the sunshine, was happy to hear every sound which like a wind came to the door of my soul. With a smile I found the skies again and felt the smell of the blooming flowers in my sigh. While I dream my dreams, I wander and discover eternity of hopes which are bringing many travels. My experience tells me that each travel is nice on its own way. Intelligence is seeking on its own, while the experience is offering me an easier way. Intelligence is suspicious, while experience is using crafty way, the way of all prestige ways. On the travel I collect the knowledge, but at the same time I get attracted to the unknown pathways. Uncertainty is feeding me with curiosity, challenge me and assure me that I have to go on. On these travels I am the judge of the world. Alive and real. Never till the end satisfied and never tired. I travel, discover and find the reasons of my travel. What I can not avoid I take it with me. Later on I concentrate on it or I leave it for the next travel.

Daily I travel through your street and I meet travelers like my self. We do notice ourselves, but we do not talk, we just nod slowly at each other and walk by. On your streets we are in a hurry and unreachable. Front façade of the buildings is looking at us, but we are quietly traveling. There are many worlds in us, so many undiscovered continents and secret places. We are still traveling in quietness. Not knowing your street we trip and collide with each other. We walk without stopping, in the precise walk of the time, we run and walk by. Our countless mind is streaming in your streets and than disappear in your yards and hallways. Hiding behind the windows and sometimes they come out to get ready for the thoughtful travel. Traveler’s ability is the way of looking and recognizing the target of the travel. Everything what fulfill us it seems simple, but when we come near that, we become scared and restless. We go on while the distance is in every beat of our hearth. We run without turning back. We continue to travel for another reason. We do not dare to go back, we believe that we are covered enough and not damaged. In the seconds we cross impossible spaces. We fly and fall, but we do not stop. We travel all the time without noticing that we are just simple quietness of the time. We are going through that quietness and restless we travel through the memories, because only memories can remind us why we started the travel.

Doubly presented in you

On a colorful poster of infinity of thought, the infinity of sound of colors, with a dance of light, it shows us a dream of our space and time. We are sure when we move on tiny moves of our thoughts. We come to every corner of the feelings and with pictures we fill out our wishes. Pictures always existed in us. We feel them in a special way, and at the same time with it we are doubly presented in you. On the places that we are and on the places that we feel. We are reachable on the see, on the mountains and smiley sunflowers. In the pictures we are adventurer, investigator, the great lovers, inflexible artist and powerful architect. We belong to the high stars in the sky. Bathed with a sun, prisoners of the fog, we are all and everywhere reachable.

When the picture, that we painted and presented the world in our own hands, is ready to be framed, we are actually giving evidence of our selves. The voice inside in us is not week like the voice that we use daily and cover our true state. With that we witness the past and present and at the same time we show the future that we have the knowledge.

The look is a window that our thought are flying through and come back there were we want to be. They are looking for inspiration and they don’t admit to the world the real reality. They don’t pay attention to limited and familiar movement. For them sensitive point of our touches are more important. While our thoughts are experiencing they are changing atmosphere and taste of the time. If they are strong, they switch day and night, so that we don’t have to be rained with from a mad sky. At the other side, not used to it, the thoughts often are trying to find a place under the sun. Sometimes because of that they go crazy, and sometimes they are quiet. The games that we accepted at the beginning, the once that we have most trust in it, in most cases it is the easiest way. However, many times we were failed from the game, that we were forced to choose for the deserved present. We are the witnesses of the drawing. We have feeling that our life that we are not happy with is talking back to us all the time. That is why we copy all the time, because we think that our original drawing is not real. Continuously we fake our behaviors and habits. We dress up with a smile that does not suit us. While we walk down the streets, we think of the reasons, and we are sitting in strange places. We wanted to be seen, but not recognized and not special. In these thoughts, the thoughts without ideas, we come close to something that does not belong to us, and it doesn’t tell who we are, where we come from and who do we belong to.

Our street, with the endless streets, is offering us the portraits of the life. Because your streets are pointed in life, like in a gallery that gives the little tubes of colors, and because of that we recognize the hope for our week human darkness. We look at you daily, and you are happy and you enjoy like an endless rainbow of our dreams.

We discover you together with you, the long hidden secret of our talents, which we in shame show it to you. You know that is different when we are around the table, but it is easier to wander off than to get lost between directions and regulations. We need you, because our peace does not recognize bureaucracy of regulations for life.

Heart, the taste of life

From time to time slowing down in a walk is good. In a continually hurry, we get older quick and we get tired quickly. That is why we need something like a resort to think about our needs wishes and possibilities. For the centuries we get together on such places, we slow down to catch a breath. That means we help our selves and we help others. Without that we would be lost and tired somewhere, and we would fall asleep before the time. Possibility of our well being is bigger, because we are closer to the nature and its wide looks.

In warm places people gather together on the cost of river, or beaches. They are satisfied and relaxed under the silver touches of the moon. They are accepting all offers for heart and soul that it is given to them for their well being. In a cold surrounding, on the beginning of the coldness, they are gathered around the fire. They both need warmth in which they will feel good. On these places they are closer to them selves than the others. We have summer and winter. Spring and fall. In every season we are determinate with the time, when and in which way we will slow down, on these resorts. Is it important to feel nice and good every time of the season? Under any circumstances of weather? Heart! It muscle works all the time, without it we would not exist, it counts all our steps, written in safe books, that we are not supposed to read. The line of life that we have to cross is long, but the heart in us stays in the same place. As a matter of fact, it moves all the time, and carry us. Sometimes fast, sometimes slow.

With the heart we are connected to ourselves, it bind us with the present time, because heart does not beat up front and doesn’t keep stopping. It follows us more than our shadow, which sometimes stays behind and disappears. Heart is real, while the shadow is not. Heart is from flesh and blood, while the shadow is illusion of our soul. Heart is truth, shadow is a trick. That is why we need to look for the truth in our hearts. Because of the truth we have to try to understand the beats. If we didn’t feel the closeness of the truth at least one time, than we can not say that we know ourselves. For that we need to have courage, freedom and honestly. These ingredients are all in our hearts. Uninterrupted it challenges in us different taste of life. Each one has a different aroma. We add it in a different measurements and it is not the same if we eat with fork or spoon. At the first the measurements of the ingredients is very important, at the second the table and the dishes that we eat with.

We can choose but in both cases the heart will make a judgment. The quantity of ingredients is deciding our freedom. In a fact, we are under very strong taste, and we can not act. Courage is an ingredient that we need in bigger amounts. Honestly is a most important ingredient of love. First of all honestly is needed as a truth and closeness to a heart. The truth gives a real color to the love. In it the rest of the ingredients get a real strength. In that color we recognize time and place for relaxations. Tired love needs help from a heart. Desired love is searching for the shelter in a heart to find a place and time.

That is why these days we are confirming the love, to you and our selves. To take a break from love, we do not need to. We do not look for such kind of break. As a matter of fact where is the break from love? In a moment or eternity? In a place or in infinity? We found in you place for love because you are eternity and infinity. That is why you are the break from love. The place to take a break from love. You relax us in your heart and we relax in your heart. We are all the time with you in your home. You are in our thought and in our touches. We don’t have to watch how much we enjoy your love, because it is enough for everyone and it will not harm our health.

Strong witness of enthusiasm

Another year went by and the moments of relaxation are more valuable. Its duration is always in a fight with our wishes for the new. In a fight of wanting and possibilities, this last possibility, is always at los. We gave presents and we were happy when we received them. Sometimes we kissed someone in a shame, and because of that we were never kissed enough. How to move on now? What to bring in a Year that is in front of us and what to expect from it?

January needs hope. The weather in January most affects string in our hearts. Times of moving and quietness in our hearts, these times are the loudest time. We are dressed up in a strong witness of the time that we do not realize our clear steps. Like we are from the glass, and we walk careful and slow on the streets.

February is in an old and usual way, cold and untouchable. Gray and it acts very serious. Unavoidable for humans or cats. We shiver with cold when we think that February is coming. With a pleasure we would fly over its small days, but we can’t. Sometimes February does us the favor. It slows our wishes, but at the same time it brings us far away from the past year that we were not happy with. It reminds us that we have to go on and we do not have to go right at the beginning. When February starts, it brings the days where we can be sure that the laziness will disappear.

Now at least the long expecting March. In March the tree doesn’t sleep, neither is awake. A March from it self is very unclear month. Its color is yellow large and free, which rises up our curiosity. Everyday offers a new challenge. It wakes up in us the relaxation and feelings for understating.

April is here. Finally orange colors. Fertile glittery and very festive. It brings peace with our soul, because we are closer to the target and farther from the beginning. Big people have no right to the small hearts. That is how is your heart in April, my city! Sky blue and fascinating! In your calmness our steps are going through the March very still.

Blue color of May is very pleasant. It seems so far but we are still honest and true to it. We enjoy it quietness. It calms down and promise. It fills in us the need for the warm quietness. Only because of us, the May is not expecting us, is welcoming us with a wide open hands. In it the passion is still weak, but awake and ready for May, for the happy month of red colors. Now we are more near to the nature, honest to our selves and closer to the possibility. Disburden from many wishes which we left accidentally or on purpose in past months.

Half way is already behind us, but still the end of the year is not near, the year where we leave the boring tiredness. We let June lead us in and we give into its golden touches. Life in June is sweet. Unacceptable smiles on our streets.  With red cheeks offers us well being and happiness. River Drava and its waves are starting to be part of us. We are all yours, and ready to take August with a hands wide open.

August! When August comes with a green color of immortality, it takes with it shadow of memories. With our hearts and souls, we belong to August. Our steps are most loud between the stars. At the same time we are walking with you and the skies. We discover in our selves that we have enough love for everyone. Even though the taste of August is the longest in our mind, but sweet September slowly and sure comes to our mind. Abundant with its juices, strengthens our passion. Thirsty we are swallowing its sunny height.  

We didn’t satisfy our thirst yet, and slowly the silver is coming. It brings us in the eternal secret circle of death and life. Short dream is interrupted by reality and our expectations are faded with pink color of October. The year is behaving like it is not at the end, but still not over. November and December are smartly still in it, and do not think of showing up. With dignity slows cold wind. Prepares the table of our rich effort , because when we are there, in the moment will take away our look from far spreading unknown year, which is already dressed up and waiting in the firmness witness of the time.

Thoughts wide open in a sky

Cloud is a river that travels through the sky. On one part of that river are stars on the other, you my city. River coast in the sky is your dream, while the coast of river Drava is your love. You hug river Drava with your hugs and you hug the stars with your beauty.

When the night is filled with the stars it is beautiful for the romance, while the full moon attracts mystery. Bad weather is looking for adventurer while the quiet and calmed night is open for the travelers. When it is foggy, it asks us to adjust to it. The experience that we get from such a night force us to breath faster and to coordinate our heart beats in a time of melody of rhythm. The night like that keeps our sense for hearing active and open. Each absorbing makes being richer.

What happened if we call Chronos and he switches hands? How do we act in that battle? Our effort is loosing when we come in touch with real battle, it receives not wanted course. We run for better times where we will find hope for ourselves and where we will try to show who we were. We will remember the loneliness, which we once belonged to like an inspiration.

In a touch of reality and dreams, you can meet us often in a time that flies away, my city. We are strollers on your street. We are finding our fears and inside peace. Is that good? I don’t think so, even though we are sometimes turned to ourselves. But what else we can do, in a fight for food, nice home and peace for our kids? What makes us happy and satisfied? The time is flying, and the time that we have for our selves needs to be compensated. Seconds and years come to us like in a moment, we need to use it, and sometimes we are not ready for it.

Thoughts wide open in a sky are talking highly about their purpose, because it takes us there where we don’t belong. There are seldom people that recognize their feelings. Their world from beginning is turned to the fake needs, pleasures, where the beginning and end is at the same place. Our first step is very important. With that step we move into the world which is offered to us in its own beauty. On that way of experience our thoughts are moving us; feelings are giving us the strength and the beauty.

The breathing that we start from a depth is in us. As we are more honest the breathing starts to be heavier. The easiest way is to give in to everything a little bit. I allow monotony to adopt us, because till then we did not fly. We barely learned how to walk, but thanks to love and understanding today we fly for sure. We fly into a New Year. Filled out with our expectation and hope.

Each front leading is a drop of sweat, which we will remember and respect. All these drops till now, we watched as experience. All shapes are familiar to us. For us, that is not just an amount of pile, confused and tired.

While we were watching old pictures we took senility of time from us. We started to collect valuable details. Before we did not notice them. It helps us when we build the knowledge about us, about everyone that is with you.

I realized who you are, and who I belong to. Even though sometimes I would think what I can do to change my self, for me to stop the sun should show up many times on the horizon, so I can look behind me and forever move the other way. With my first new steps in this year, the world that I am watching is different. We are moving on. You and me with the world in us, because there is always something not familiar to us. Something that challenges our reflection.

Visionary decisiveness of silence

The silence brings human beings through the wide open door of light. Its visionary decisiveness gives possibility for life, the life in which will people feel the world and be part of it. It is unavoidable. Sometimes, it brings us something familiar, but the craft of watching is hard and sometimes bloody job. To see something doesn’t mean to know it, but to have a vision it happens seldom. That is a gift that humans coordinate their consciousness. The difference between seen is ability. Beauty is also different. Our thoughts are flying more free and they are disposed to human being and everything around them. It offers it self like a guide through the consciousness which we just started to get to know. It looks like us takes in throws away, and in a fact is moving in and around us.

Long time ago human being was watching over the city with build in walls, and in that way protecting the safe world. The history on its own way describes many danger and experience that city was exposed to and human beings in it. Bad always existed. Powerful nature force came from all sides of the world. From up and down, continents, seas and skies. Sometimes strong, sometimes weak, but that was past time. The biggest storms that existed are in the human beings consciousness. Like an unbreakable string for centuries walking. It was proven like the worst and highest.

Human beings wished for the chaos, that they produced things which are behind mind and understandable. It continues running away from quietness, was bringing disturbance and left only consequences. Memory doesn’t fade. Forgetfulness can’t take away human being. Human being is inaccessible. They are the best friends to them selves.

We always admired the toys. Since we were the children we recognized in them our world, and we dreamed about the day when we will completely live in it. Our presence, the hands that were growing from us, all that was only ours. We recognized totally different shapes from the shapes that we know today. Street talk, animals movement, the houses that walked by, all of these was a toy that offered us quietness. They understood us like we understand them. We build up our world in sand and we moved it to the sky. We were powerful owners of far away world. We were inventors of not known things. Everything we needed was inside of us. Everything lasted forever and never ended. It seemed like the big people didn’t exist, besides the people that were close to us. We were afraid from them, but we loved them. We told them our secrets and sometimes we brought them to our world.

I think that is how you wanted us. You pointed the fate to us, because from the experience you knew that with these toys we will recognize the real world. You allowed us to expend in our games in your parks and streets. What we dreamt before became a vision and we moved on. Even with our human mistakes and miscommunications, that hurt sometimes, we build up your quietness. We are building you visually and discover the secrets in which you are everyday bigger and nicer.

Our city, the dream that we dreamed is your beauty and your pride. The river Drava never left you, neither will us. Even if we leave is just temporary, we will still come back, because in our hearts we have many ways to go back to sand and skies.

Large, in look of time

You have sun in your hands and stars in your heart. You have two lights, one for day one for night. Both of them are powerful. You have two skies. Under one you are standing familiar, under other you shine. They are magnifying you and it doesn’t matter how still you are trying to be, persistently they are taking your somewhere. You will never make it to the place where you need to rest, but it is good uninterrupted to circle with a sky in your self. It fleshes our lightening and opens the way to the consciousness.

You are not abstract, light is incarnate in you. The beauty that you present your self to us is not leaving us indifferent. Even the bad empires between us are feeling your attraction. Your streets and your parks have big parts in that. Even us, whom we are growing in you, and you are growing in us, we create big picture in you. Close to the eye, even closer to the heart.

You have two rivers. One is the sky river; the other is flowing through your heart. With the first one you wash your self; with the other you give the life. Both rivers are renewing you. You have two hearts. Golden in which birds are singing, and the heart that you watch us. You have warm heart, which never takes our smile away, and you love us forever with it. You have us in you, and we are truly caring you in us. You are handsome when we talk about you; you are nice when we think about you. I affirm with certainty, even thought the sun is always the same and the skies didn’t change since centuries, that you will be most beautiful in this new century.

The speed that we enforce on us is starting to be insecure and violent. In that moving of time, like till now, you try to adopt in your own way. Today you exist more than last year, and the next year you will start to avoid daily rush. You will always find ways how to slow us down and hide in the places that you only left for us.

Long ago we were walking often on your streets. You were bigger in the people’s eyes. They had more time for you. Their tracks were softly coming through the air. In every corner of your streets, the seasons were leaving real smell. Their greenery was mixed in a touch of a wind. Today like before the skies are stopping, but we do not notice them. We justifying in your growing, my city. Your streets are faster and wider. We are comparing with the time, you understand why we are trying to run across the time, and with it we surround your wideness. Your steps are not enough to us. We don’t look into your eyes enough. We race on your street and your parks. Sometimes we are ashamed of that because the time is watching us, and smiling at us.

We are in the sixth year of the twenty first century. We are on the beginning of the new millennium. You should not worry because you have the experience in you from the previous centuries. With your spirit and your body you withstand our challenges. You learned with our coming and our going away. We always bring you and leave the piece with you that you are proud of and your beauty is permanently. You welcoming us and accompany us and we feel better. We have you in ourselves. Together we are able to trick the time. You have two hearts, one that follow us, with the other you keep us. You have the heart for us and that is good to know.